I have forgotten about this blog for so long. I finally have a place to let everything off of my chest. I have spent too long deciding what I really wanted in life, that I let it all go. I only have myself to blame. I hurt people who loved me unconditionally. I've let trust issues mess with my mind, let others influence my feelings and decisions. Now all I have left is to well in the fact that everything I wanted I already had, and I pushed it away. I know I only have myself too blame but I still feel lonely, like I lost the other half of who I am. Lost the only person I truly loved. My best friend Now all I can do is focus on, making a better life for myself and my son. Though half of me will always be missing. Everything happened so fast and I had so many different opinions in my ear I never knew who or what to believe. I should have realized this sooner but I didn't. I could have had a family, now it'll be just me and Nevan. I can't wait to find us a place!! :) it's going to be so much fun. I'm so excited to do my own furnishing and decorating! & I hope he is happy or will find someone that will make him happy. Time heals everything but until then I'll cry here and there and blame myself. Think of all of the things I should or shouldn't have done, and always wonder.... Was I that awful, that is was so easy to fall out of love with me. That's life. You live, you love, you lose, and hopefully at the end of the line find happiness!
-xoxo
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Life is a journey, and its only you who take the journey. Some people will follow you, walk along side of you. But it will always be your journey. Don't let anyone influence what to do in life. --although here I am saying what you can do! LMAO. Let God and Let be. You know in your heart whats right and whats not. Its the mother in us.
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